Queuing: the last bastion of British tradition battered by Starmer
HOW WAS the New Year morning for you?
Some might have woken up with a thick head; others, who didn’t overdo some enchanting produce from the left bank, might have enjoyed that delicious moment when one is caught ‘twixt Morpheus and reality, before blinking and realising that they were still denizens of the People’s Republic of Britain.
A land where 10-year plans, hapless apparatchiks, faceless bureaucrats, overbearing jobsworths, crumbling infrastructure and unchecked crime are everyday realities; a land where inadequacy and incompetence are virtues worthy of recognition and veneration; a land where Sir Keir, Kemi and Ed decide what the put-upon electorate really need to perk them up: sanctimonious homilies about change, all delivered with the sincerity of a practised card shark plying his trade on unsuspecting victims.
Yet plucky Albions, be not downhearted! Sip from the chalice of sustenance, where there remain a few smouldering remnants of identity that, like DNA, make us what we are. Britons can still proudly boast to be world-beaters on disparate, yet oddly unifying, fronts.
For example, despite competition from overseas, Britain can still lay claim to the coveted crown of the underrated yet admirable art of queuing.
The whole piece is well worth reading, both for amusement and for the scalpel McKibbin uses on our political class.
7 comments:
Who hasn't thought that if "Your call is important to us . . ." really meant it they would make more people available to take the calls?
On a recent holiday to Bulgaria, I took myself off to explore nearby Nessebar (worth the visit), by means of the local bus (silly boy). Although second in the queue of about 20 people, I was the last to board, and had to stand. However, I made sure I did not make the same mistake on the return journey, and got the best seat in the bus. Queuing may be a quintessentially English tradition, but it's very easy to adapt to local customs.
Penseivat
DJ - yes, never quite important enough to employ more people. A recent call Mrs H made to our insurance outfit was answered by an AI system. Not great, but it worked.
Penseivat - a lesson learned very quickly from the sound of it. Maybe those in the queue knew there wouldn't be enough seats for 20. When the children were very young and Mrs H had to take them with her on a bus journey, she would often mention how pensioners behind her in the bus queue would barge ahead of her when the bus arrived.
Yet another occasion when Starmer comes across as being completely clueless as to how he will be perceived. Obviously, a head of state can't stand around in a queue for ages, and his security detail will make sure he knows that. So, he's got a clear choice. He can go to the front of the queue and weather the storm of genuine and faked outrage from people calling him a hypocrite and entitled. Or, he can decide to do something other than give his kids a ride in a wicker basket thingie. Tough choice....
Sam - yes he's a very strange man indeed. Even if he doesn't care what people think of him, he ought to be able to work out that these incidents shape political perception. It isn't even slightly difficult to grasp, but apparently he doesn't.
Many, many years ago, I went with my family to a charity cricket match at Arundel Castle. The game was between the Duke of Edinburgh's 11 and The Duke of Norfolk's 11. Between innings I had to visit the temporary gent's ,a corrugated iron structure. There was a queue waiting so I stood in line. Then a loud voice asked in a plummy accent, "Excuse me gentlemen but would you mind if I jumped the queue/" Turning round I saw an elderly gent in cricket whites and a very colourful striped blazer. Someone said ," Of course not Your Grace, this is your place after all" When he came back out ,the Duke said ,"thank you very much Gentlemen, I appreciate your courtesy" and went back to the game. A real gentleman himself.
John - interesting, no wonder you remembered it. We don't come across gentlemen of that class these days, I don't think there are any in politics. A pity I think.
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