Quick - change the targets

Starmer ‘sidelines’ flagship pledge to make Britain fastest-growing nation in G7

Sir Keir Starmer will “sideline” his flagship pledge to make the UK the fastest-growing economy in the G7 this week when he unveils new targets to make British people richer.

The Prime Minister’s pre-election promise is already under threat, with the US economy growing twice as quickly as the UK and a tax-hiking Budget lowering medium-term forecasts.

This week, as part of a new “Plan for Change”, Sir Keir will reveal different economic targets aimed at improving living standards by the next general election.

Hmm - economic targets aimed at improving living standards by the next general election eh? Here are a few suggestions, although it's really too easy.

Reduce taxation.

Acknowledge the crucial role of the private sector. 

Reduce immigration to achieve a closer match between house building and population.

No hurty words policing.

Halve university intake.

Make the BBC subscription only.

Ditch Net Zero.

Ditch Ed Miliband.

BBC goes to subscription only in 2025.

Genuine reform of the NHS.

First world roads without potholes.  

Rachel Reeves sacked.

Keir Starmer resigns.

Missing Parts

North Korean teams hunt for advanced military parts abroad

The components in question are crucial for North Korea to enhance its military capabilities but exceed its current technical manufacturing abilities

North Korea dispatched technical teams to Dandong, China and major Russian cities in early November to procure advanced military components like electronic parts and miniature semiconductors that are banned under international sanctions. The roughly ten-person teams from North Korea’s Academy of National Defense Science aim to acquire technology beyond North Korea’s domestic production capabilities.

Hmm, any outside observer is bound to wonder about the likelihood of Chinese suppliers selling genuine parts to those North Korean teams.

Should any team return to North Korea with fake parts, they aren't going back to China to complain, not after Kim Jong Un has been really cross with them.

Not the full Penny

 

Agreeing with Diane feels strange

Labour civil war as Diane Abbott slams Keir Starmer's ‘poor judgement' on winter fuel cuts

Labour's Diane Abbott has lashed out at party leader Sir Keir Starmer live on television as she berated his "poor judgement" in accepting freebies and cutting winter fuel payments.

Yes Diane is right, it was poor political judgement. Everyone but Starmer and Reeves knows that, and even Reeves may have worked it out by now. Starmer doesn't seem to work anything out, just looks for rules and precedents. 

Sir Keir Havisham

     

As we contemplate Keir Starmer and his Cabinet rabble, what comes to mind? Probably many impolite descriptions considerably worse than the word ‘rabble’, but how about ‘antiquated’?

That would be the antiquated, unidirectional mode of government where those at the top dictate to those further down the social scale. We’re familiar with unidirectional government. Yet since the internet became a significantly bidirectional means of communication, rigidly top down government begins to seem curiously antiquated.

As if cobwebs hang festooned above the Cabinet table and the persistent dust of time settles gently on the heads of nodding Cabinet members. Metaphorical dust and decay pervade even their most enthusiastic deliberations and there aren’t many of those. 

Like Miss Havisham in Charles Dickens’ Great Expectations, Sir Keir Starmer presides over lost expectations and the visible decay of intellectual authority conferred on itself by authority.

Anyone with the time and the inclination to browse the internet, and this must be the majority of the population, knows about its bidirectional aspect. Watch a video, browse social media, scan favoured news channels, leave a comment or a ‘like’, subscribe or don’t subscribe or put your own material, opinions, likes, ideas, parodies or eccentricities out there.

By comparison, legacy media outlets are creaking antiques, still clinging to the old unidirectional ways, as are our political parties and governments. In an interesting sense, the internet is intelligent, it responds to questions, offers alternative sources, answers or possibilities.

Compare this to Keir Starmer’s Cabinet, his world of cobwebbed rules, legalistic dust and a crabbed, antiquated faith in laws, lies and spiteful deception.

Rocks with drawings

9,000-year-old rock sketches proves early humans knew all about dinosaurs

Researchers made an extraordinary discovery of 9,000-year-old rocks with drawings etched into them, positioned next to footprints believed to belong to dinosaurs from the Cretaceous Period around 66 million years ago.

The drawings, known as petroglyphs, were found in the agricultural site Serrote do Letreiro in Paraíba, Eastern Brazil.


Okay it's the Indy, so not to be taken too seriously on any subject without checking sources. Those petroglyphs clearly mean something like -

Need bigger spears.

Or

You catch it, I'll cook it.

Not an ultra-rare Grauniad piece though

Vote on assisted dying summons ultra-rare Commons sight: intelligent debate

The emotion on display during five hours of heated discussion speaks to the complexity and importance of the bill itself

This was the Labour backbencher Kim Leadbeater’s bill so she got to talk first. Horror stories of people dying agonising deaths – deaths that no one would wish on their worst enemies. Jennie the guide dog snoozed in an aisle. Her dreams untroubled. She knew that when the time comes, her end will be painless and swift. Even if not of her conscious choosing.

Although there are good arguments on both sides, it's not a complex issue, the main point for each side may be stated in a single paragraph. However it is an opportunity to air a cascade of emotional anecdotes and imaginary scenarios. Political actors and comfort-zone media such as the Grauniad love all that. 

The independent Adnan Hussain thought we had already started assisted dying by removing the winter fuel allowance. For the only time in the debate, cries of “shame” were heard.

Of course they cried "shame" - what a spoilsport.