There is increasing concern that donkey DNA is turning up in
numerous MPs. Experts from the Science Policy Authority (SPA) are investigating, but have
run into problem trying to corral recalcitrant MPs into the testing arena.
The source of the donkey DNA is not yet known and the effect
on MP’s behaviour is even more uncertain, although one wag has commented that
the rogue DNA will at least dilute the weasel version they usually find in these cases.
Labour leader Ned Miliband tried to brush aside this latest
contamination scare, claiming that a touch of donkey never did anyone any harm. His stable mate Ned Balls agreed.
Update - shocking new research.
A more alarming and long-term aspect of the donkey DNA story is that politicians and their bureaucratic masters may be evolving away from the main branch of Homo Sapiens. Clearly a finding with serious implications for the whole human race.
After extensive research and testing, genetic experts from SPA are now convinced that the apparent donkey DNA found in
MPs does not derive from actual donkeys, but is merely a genetic similarity.
Homo Politicus may
well have many characteristics of the real donkeys we all know and love, but quite obviously
lacks the lovable, hard-working and affectionate nature donkeys generally
possess. We should not mistake the inhumanly stubborn obduracy and comparatively
lowly intelligence found in MPs for genuine donkey characteristics.
How this amazing evolutionary lapse came about is still a mystery,
but Flouncer, the minister with overall responsibility for SPA was quick to
play down any possibility that genetic testing may become an essential part of the MP
selection process.
Ideas like that are just bloody
racist, Flouncer brayed, nostrils flaring.
7 comments:
'...politicians and their bureaucratic masters may be evolving away from the main branch of Homo Sapiens.'
Were they ever fully paid-up members of the species in any case?
The older I get, the more convinced I am that 'homo sapiens' is the worst misnomer ever.
Does being homo politicus mean that they go around buggering Cardinals then AK?
A wicked insult to all donkeys. Anyway, it would be difficult to hang a donkey from a lamppost but a politician.....
Mac - I agree, where did the sapiens get too?
Angus - it means they can bugger anyone who isn't sitting down.
Roger - politicians are too heavy though. They break the piano wire.
Ah, well that explains it then. And I'd been wondering.
Thought I recognised that face - voted for him last time!
James - there's always a simple explanation.
David - strangely enough, so did I!
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