Wednesday, 2 November 2011

Spot the difference

As I look around my study, I wonder which bits have not attracted various forms of taxation over and over again in minute, fanatical detail.  

The carpet – lots of taxes there. Carpet fibres, backing material, dyes, other raw materials, design processes, transport, retailing and fitting – and even then the carpet isn’t fully accounted for.

The walls – lots of taxes there too. Plasterboard, paint, pigments and chemicals, transport and retailing. Still more to go on walls, but let’s finish with what we have.

My laptop – no - don’t even go there.

My chair – lot more taxes. The metal frame, surface coatings, plastic mouldings, fabrics, foam cushioning, fire retardants, assembly, transport and retailing.

My little eighteenth century table. Hmm...


David Duff said...

Don't forget to include yourself in that long list!

Sam Vega said...

Dear Mr Haart,

It has recently come to the attention of our Antique Assets Department that you might be in possession of an item of eighteenth century furniture. You will no doubt be aware that such items attract an annual tax which is currently calculated as [years of age x £0.79 x 12%]. You will shortly be receiving a visit from our age-estimator, with a view to finalising your tax bill for this item for the current financial year. You should also note that this sum could be added to the new Blogging Tax which is currently awaiting approval.

Yours etc,

HM Revenue and Customs

rogerh said...

Had you bought your table back in 1780 you would probably been a fairly wealthy fellow. Taxed at say 40% on your land value with further taxes on your coach, silverware, candles and windows and your hats and the gold and silver threads in your er threads. With no NHS you would pay handsomely for leeches and to be bled thoroughly. You would of course pay to send your (sons only) to a rough place like Dotheboys. Although I seem to recall that about this time HMG cut the tax on mahogany so your table seemed a bargain back then. As now a grimy attorney would invent some good tax avoidance measures - for money. Death and taxes....

A K Haart said...

DD - too right.

SV - aargh - what a giveaway this blogging lark can be.

rogerh - I did buy it in 1780 Sir, but like a dunderhead I paid in gold sovereigns on the advice of a fellow named Brown.