A while ago we took the grandkids to the cinema to watch a
movie they probably understood even though I didn’t. No matter – it was an
enjoyable experience.
Somebody had brought an autistic boy who was obviously and
noisily unsettled and troubled by the experience. Eventually the lady looking
after him had to take him out even though he pleaded with her to let him stay.
She had calmly and patiently tried to keep him tolerably quiet and persuade him
to enjoy the movie but it was no go.
To my mind it requires the patience of a saint to cope with
an autistic boy in this way, quietly handling what proved to be a disappointing
attempt to brighten his existence by a visit to the cinema. It was only a tiny
slice of an unknown life but I know I couldn’t do it. I’m patient but I’m not a
saint. No – I just couldn’t do it.
On the other hand we have Cardinal Newman’s progress towards sainthood. Maybe he was a saintly man, but there are no such things as miracles and he did not have to look after autistic kids.
2 comments:
Agreed. I remember a scene from long ago - probably the 1970s. It was late evening (dark, but before the pubs emptied) in tree-lined suburbia. A man in his sixties, looking the epitome of respectable middle-England, was walking with his teenage or early-twenties daughter on a quiet strip of grass beneath some trees. She had some kind of physical and mental disability, and was fastened in a harness - a bit like taking a dog for a walk. I knew on seeing them that this was a nightly ritual; taking his daughter for her walk, at a time when she was away from prying eyes and the pitying stares. He looked, of course, utterly worn out and defeated by life, but some determination kept him going. As well as intuitively knowing or imagining the details of their existence, I also knew that this same plodding desperate undemonstrative love would have broken me.
Sam - a grim story - it would have broken me too. Or would it? Are those reserves of duty deeper than we imagine? I don't know but I still don't think I could cope with something like that.
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