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Tuesday, 6 February 2018

Where they really belong


I think you can’t let people alone too much. For my part, if I try to characterize my friends, I fail to do them perfect justice, of course; and yet the imperfect result remains representative of them in my mind; it limits them and fixes them; and I can’t get them back again into the undefined and the ideal where they really belong.

William Dean Howells - A Foregone Conclusion (1875)


It is easy enough to grasp Howells’ point about not analysing friends too much, why we should leave them in the undefined and the ideal where they really belong. Friendships are fragile, easily damaged. Maybe the same caution also applies to certain acquaintances such as a good boss, a competent doctor or an amiable barber.

What about celebrities, favoured political figures or even football teams? Here we are inclined to turn the thing on its head - here we tend to leave them in the undefined and the ideal where they really do not belong.

3 comments:

Anonymous said...

That is why one should keep friends close and enemies closer.

Demetrius said...

Given that it is so easy to make mistakes and so hard to get things right, it is better not to bother.

A K Haart said...

Roger - the trouble is, our real enemies are inaccessible.

Demetrius - possibly so, it's mostly instinctive anyway.