This afternoon we were shopping in Derby. The day was
pleasant for March with blue skies and warm sun. Even Derby can be tolerable in
fine weather. A drunk weaved towards us clutching his can of lager.
It must be strange to 'ave
teeth, he mumbled as he lurched past.
Oddly enough we’d both been to the dentist that morning. Coincidence
of course, but maybe we’d blinded him with our freshly-polished teeth.
Must be a short story in there somewhere.
9 comments:
Hit by two sets of white fangs - a shock for any self-respecting drunk.
I used to work at the big concrete complex in Hulland Ward, just after Brailsford.
One day, a chap came to replace a windscreen on a company car, and when he left, he said something like...
"There's a piece of paper stuck inside, and it'll only take a bit of moisture to get it off"!
Bless his heart, it took about ten seconds for him to say the word 'moisture'!
Being someone from Kent, this is different!
I believe you can get non-brilliant white teeth so that they don't look out of place; like what they used to call "prestressed" jeans.
And then there are gold teeth, which have latterly become the mark of a drug dealer and other such lowlife. Though not everywhere. There is a rich man in China called Lee Ming Tee whose gold gnashers have earned him the soubriquet "Gleaming Teeth."
You may recall from my blog that I once accidentally burned my mother-in-law's teeth.
By the way,why do we say "weaved" in this context, not "wove"?
"Must be a short story in there somewhere."
One titled "The parlous state of British dentistry" perhaps? What I was charged for dental work a few years back was frankly obscene (a five figure sum folks)! At least in the US they know where they stand when it comes to dental work. Over here? We have they rather fey notion that the NHS will help us out (which of course is paid for through our taxes). Hah!
By the way, it wasn't Shane MacGowan was it? Oh, and meant "We have this rather fey notion" in my 09:14 post above!
James - as pensioners we have to share one set :)
Michael - we often pass through Hulland Ward on the way to Ashbourne. Pleasant looking place.
Sackers - I think brilliant white teeth look odd. They should be the colour of ivory, or old ivory as the years pile up.
I don't know the answer to your weaved/wove question. Weaved just sounds more harmonious to my cloth ear. He weaved through other pedestrians.
JPS - five figures is steep, was it implants? We use Denplan, but I think we'd still have to pay for major reconstruction jobs.
He did look like Shane MacGowan, although I suppose drunks often do.
Hi AKH. Not implants - just crowns, but it was a big reconstruction job. Was told I'd lose them if I didn't undergo it so not just vanity (if I'd been a couple of decades older I might have just told him to whip 'em out). Right, off to dig out some Pogues - a fitting day to do so, of course
("Ooh she gave me Mekong Whiskey Ooh she gave me Hong Kong Flu
Ooh she gave me Mekong Whiskey Put me on a breeze to Katmandu")
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