Now that sugar has turned out to be so lethal, even when completely hidden inside a cream scone (pronounced scone) a ray of sunshine comes along to warm our sweet-toothed despair.
Experts from the Institute of Nutritional Flagellation (INF) have produced a report claiming that after
extensive studies, there is a safe food for humans.
Grass.
However, the INF boffins warn that
this most welcome finding doesn’t mean you should rush out and gather a snack of
lawn clippings. Their advice is that harvested grass must be washed and
pasteurised before it is safe to eat. Major supermarket chains are
expected to market ready to eat packs of fresh or dried grass.
According to the INF, dried grass, or “hay” as it was often called in the past,
may be reconstituted simply by adding boiling water to make a lo-cal broth.
Numerous grass recipes are being devised by official health
experts, but my favourite is a thick and juicy seared grass-steak devised by
our unhealthy ancestors and still enjoyed today.
Take one calf, fatten it up on lots of nutritious grass, kill
it, hang the carcase for twenty eight days then cook and eat the steaky bits.
7 comments:
Apparently, silage is quite pleasant to eat...
I think I'd be several miles behind the front of the queue to try that particular comestible!
Ivan Denisovich and his fellow gulag prisoners were fed on boiled grass.
Michael - I'd be some way behind you for that treat.
Sackers - I wonder why they boiled it? I can't see it adding much nutritional value.
All the same, beginning to feel a little tenderness in one tooth, so maybe a bit less of the sweet item might be indicated.
James - I soon tire of too much sweet stuff.
http://dilbert.com/strips/comic/2002-08-05/
Chuck - I'd love to be able to produce a cartoon like Dilbert.
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