Thursday, 8 December 2016

A Cornucopia of Dorks

As you may know, previous winners of the Dork of the Year award were Ed Miliband in 2015 and Naomi Klein in 2014. Both obvious choices at the time, but this year presents a few difficulties. An observation from 2015 has become even more relevant in 2016.

The sheer number of candidates has made choosing Dork of the Year (DotY) particularly difficult for 2015. Not that the problem is new because each year there seem to be even more Qualifying Dorks than the year before.

Obviously Ed Miliband still has a major Qualifying Dorkworthy Achievement in that Jeremy Corbyn still "leads" the Labour Party. This outstanding, almost magnificent blunder is mostly down to Ed's destructive masterstroke of 2015. However, in a surprising move, the DotY committee has decided to exclude Mr Miliband. Another Award may be deserved, but two in a row would not reflect the vast range of other Dorkworthy Achievements in 2016.

The final announcement will be made shortly before the New Year.  


Sam Vega said...

I would depserately like to nominate a couple of contenders, if I may. But could you please clarify the criteria? What is it that differentiates Dorks proper, from such related categories as Muppets, Twats, and Pillocks?

A K Haart said...

Sam - nominate away. Muppets, Twats, and Pillocks all come under the Qualifying Rules as compiled some seconds ago by the committee.

Sam Vega said...

My thanks to the committee, and I'd like to nominate the great Mark Carney.

The humiliatingly complete failure of his economic predictions before the Brexit vote mark him out as a fool of the first order. Anyone can get things wrong. But for the person with the best data and greatest need for scientific impartiality to get it so utterly wrong is clearly an outstanding piece of work. He should have been neutral, but he was obtusely partisan. He should have been cautious, but was reckless. And then he compounded the error by not saying sorry, and this week blatted on with a series of breezy predictions about a "lost decade". So either an incompetent overpaid clown, or a venal placeman.

I look forward to your deliberations, but I humbly suggest that a bigger Dork than Carney will be hard to find.

wiggiatlarge said...

"Muppets, Twats, and Pillocks" that does give everyone an enormous choice of candidates all thoroughly deserving, outside the massed ranks of politicians that qualify here and abroad, it was watching the opening credits (before switching over) of QT that illustrated the rich pickings available by having one of the most annoying vindictive shits on the planet on the panel, Will Self, the name says it all.

Though I am sure that other equally qualified nominees can be found, in fact I know they can.

Demetrius said...


A K Haart said...

Sam - good choice, beating Carney is likely to prove difficult but the competition is hot.

Wiggia - Will Self annoys me too. He's so transparently putting it on.

Demetrius - another good choice. I'd send her an email with a few testing questions, but it might end up on Mr Putin's desk.