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Thursday, 8 March 2012

Checkouts and trumpets


From Wikipedia


Today, I discovered that the lady on our Sainsbury’s checkout plays the trumpet in a brass band. Everybody does something interesting don’t they? So why doesn’t Sainsbury’s use her talents and have a brass band occasionally?

I don’t just mean the Salvation Army at Christmas, but a proper brass band somewhere near the fruit and veg where there’s a bit of room.

I’m sure it would help sales because I for one would surely pop an extra black pud and a bottle or two of brown ale into my trolley. The timing of brass band days could be themed to coincide with promotions on Hovis, faggots and special offers on frozen chips.

But they lack imagination these supermarkets, don’t they? We know all about their games where the big packet is more expensive than two smaller packets. We aren’t convinced or conned by any of it. But a bit of brass band music of a Wednesday say – that would surely add a touch of emotional zest to our shopping habits.

Because they aren’t really convincing are they – supermarkets? For example - why not try a whiff of blue haze in the coffee shop atmosphere – while the early morning fry-ups are being prepared. That would be more convincing than a kind of sterile tang of coffee and blueberry muffins.

A brass band though – that would be even better.

5 comments:

James Higham said...

I’m sure it would help sales because I for one would surely pop an extra black pud and a bottle or two of brown ale into my trolley.

Very much so but the PC police would soon put a stop to that.

Sam Vega said...

James:

"Very much so but the PC police would soon put a stop to that."

You'd be fine if it was the Black Dyke Band.

A K Haart said...

Dear Mr Google,

Allow me to explain. There really is a UK brass band...

Roger said...

Strumpets maybe, trumpets, never.

A K Haart said...

Roger - strumpets and crumpets but no trumpets?